How do you Adress Wedding Invtations?

Q: What are the general rules for addressing wedding invitations?

A: Addressing wedding invitations can seem a bit confusing, but the rules are relatively simple for most of the people on your guest list. Spell out titles and degrees (“Doctor”), and always use “Mr. and Mrs.” for married couples. If a couple is unmarried but living together, or is married but uses different last names, put their names on separate lines in alphabetical order. (Unmarried couples who do not live together should receive two separate invitations.) And, if a guest is in the military, the title of an officer whose rank is equal to or higher than a captain in the army or a lieutenant in the navy is placed next to his or her name with the branch of service below. You should also include titles for retired high-ranking officers, inserting (Ret.) after their names. And the branch of service should always be listed below the names of reserve officers on active duty, noncommissioned officers and enlisted persons.

As for children, it is unnecessary to include their names on the outer envelope of a wedding invitation. Instead, list them on the inner envelope with their parents (“Mr. and Mrs. O’Brien and Peter”). The absence of a child’s name altogether implies that he or she is not invited. However, many guests may not realize this and assume their children are invited. If you don’t want kids to come, be sure to spread the word that you can only accommodate adults at your reception, and do not leave a space with “Number of guests” to be filled in.

Finally, inner envelopes should be addressed to “Mr. and Mrs. Markham” without first names or addresses. Close relatives can be addressed as “Aunt Sue” or “Grandmother Smith” on the inner envelope only. And if a single person is invited with an unspecified guest, add “and Guest” to the inner envelope to indicate that he or she may bring a date (however, it’s always preferable to send an individual invitation to someone’s guest if you know who the guest will be).

Hosting a Wedding like a Pro

Put out the wedding welcome mat for your out of town guests.

Out of town guests make wedding matters more tricky. There are rooms to block, transportation to book, directions to give and gift bags to stuff. It seems like there are more wedding weekend travelers than ever.

Start Early

Sending Save the Date cards is the best way to let guests know they will need to plan ahead. It's most considerate to send those out six to eight months before the big day. The information should be kept simple - include your names, the wedding date and place, a wedding website URL - if you have one, and hotel information.

Block Rooms Strategically

When choosing a hotel to recommend to guests, always keep in mind location, price, and special features. A location near both the ceremony and reception will make it easier for guests to get around. Guests will appreciate it if you block rooms at a discounted rate. Contracts vary from hotel to hotel so go over the details before you sign. In some cases, a credit card deposit may be required, and there may be a deadline for booking rooms (usually about four weeks in advance).

Consider a Shuttle

If you have room in your budget, hire a bus to shuttle guests from the hotel to the wedding and back. It provides a designated driver  - plus, party buses can be fun. Have flip-flops for tired feet, bottled water, mints, and aspirin on the bus - guests will appreciate your thoughtfulness.

Don't Overdo it

It's customary to invite everyone coming from afar to the rehearsal dinner - and sometimes to a next-day brunch - if financially feasible. Take good care of your guests, but don't feel guilty if you can't afford to wine and dine them all weekend long.

Gift Giving

Guest will appreciate a little basket or bag of treats to help them feel welcome.

• Comfort and Care: Bottled water, fruit and other convenient snacks should satisfy their just-arrived cravings. Throw in some bubble bath and soft slippers too!
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• City-Centric: Getting married in the big city? Provide bus or rail route info, a map, a guidebook and some locally sourced treats
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• Beachy Keen: For a beach wedding, fill a colorful sand pail with flip-flops, sunscreen, and a gift card for ice cream on the boardwalk. 
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• Morning Glory: A bagel, juice, pain reliever, and the newspaper will make the morning after enjoyable.